Just one of ‘those’ days

One of my friends wrote a blog post the other day and in it she described the different types of mums she has encountered. I tried to work out which one I was and couldn’t so she told me i was ‘got it together mum’. Either she was just being nice, or this story will change her mind!

I met my ‘homemade’ mothers group for lunch today (I didn’t make it into a ‘real’ mothers group as I signed up too late, apparently they have time limits now… ) and I couldn’t seem to get bub to sleep the whole time.

Where we met for lunch was close to Ikea and Toys”R”Us so I figured why not kill two birds with one stone and buy baby proofing items from said stores afterwards while baby naps in pram (baby is almost crawling AND this happened) .

IKEA or Toys”R”Us first?

I decided on IKEA as I only needed the one thing from there (when actually I ended up buying 8 things). So we race on in and of course baby falls straight asleep in the pram. Not wanting to wake her up, I decided i’d walk my way across to Toys”R”Us with the pram instead of driving (its just too carparks and a road). Surely that was easy enough right?

WRONG.

I head towards the road to survey the scene and notice there isn’t really a good path that takes you from one side to the other. Theres a big old roundabout to the right but i can’t really see a path down there either.

(But I’ve committed and baby is asleep so i’m doing this either way.)

I continue surveying and notice there is some sort of makeshift path that leads across the road into a dirt carpark, which then leads into the Toys”R”Us carpark so I figure thats our best shot (seriously, how annoying is Toys”R”Us to write) . We make our way across this path (really its just boards with multitudes of bumps on them) and it is literally the bumpiest shit i have ever been on. The pram is bouncing around and all I can think is “please stay asleep, please stay asleep, please stay asleep”.

She stays asleep.

We even make it across the dirt carpark with her asleep.

I have to stop for two seconds before crossing to Toys”R”Us and i look down and GUESS WHO OPENS UP HER LITTLE PEEPERS!!!  Seriously, we just made it across the bumpiest grounds asleep and you wake up when I stop walking for two seconds?

Maybe she’ll fall back asleep? (LAUGH OUT LOUD)

No turning back now though so we make our way into Toys”R”Us and buy the safety gate and some spare dummies (BECUASE WHERE DO ALL THE DUMMIES GO?!) Nappies are also on special so we invest in a big old box of those too.

After purchasing, I pack everything into the pram and realise they don’t really all fit so I have a tower of baby accessories piled up in the pram basket like the leaning tower of pisa.

I’m making my way out of the shopping centre (nice and slow) trying to balance everything and I go down a little hill and BANG everything falls out. A poor old man who has been watching this unfold comes to my rescue. I take the baby out of the pram to carry her, and he loads the fallen goods into where she was seated and we are off again.

We make it about 10 metres until I realise it’s super sunny so i have to stop and put her hat on.

Aaaaaannd, we are off again.

Until theres a gust of wind and off goes the hat.

Collect hat, return to mission.

Another 10 metres and baby realises she can smell my milk and she’s super starving so starts the old ‘peck peck, motorboat motorboat, squawk squawk’ routine . I spot some chairs along the walkway in the carpark so find one in the shade and sit down to feed. I figure this is a good move anyway as it will give me time to assess the situation and work out a plan of attack in getting the baby, her pram, and the shopping back to the car without picking up a flying hat every 10 metres.

While seated, I decide to divide up the big box of nappies into their individual bags and squish two under the pram with all the other goods and attach the third onto the pram clip.

Success.

I’ve also spotted a path which looks like it runs along the side of the road up to the roundabout and surely we can just cross there?

This’ll be an easy trip back.

So off we set again, down the path (la de da) and we get to the round about and FUCK. The path just stops literally right there. So I just stand there.

People are driving round the round-about staring at me and I’m just standing there.

“WHAT IS THIS CRAZY (UNDER-SLEPT) LADY DOING JUST STANDING THERE AT THE ROUNDABOUT WITH HER PRAM SHOULD I HELP HER???!!!”

Eventually, I decide to just take the roundabout like a car would, then get onto the grass on the other side to make my way back down to the dirt carpark.

Its hard work pushing this pram on the grass so I’ve got my head down powering along. Of course I’m also wearing one of those dresses that rides up when you walk (because I don’t buy myself new clothes because I spend all my money on the baby) so every few steps I’m also doing the pull down, jiggle jiggle, pull down.

Half way along I look down and see baby spit her dummy so I stop to put it back in and WHERE HAS IT GONE???!!! I literally just saw her spit it out.

So now we are doing 5 metre laps up and back the grass looking for this dummy and it is NOWHERE TO BE FOUND? (Seriously, where do these dummies go? Are they happily living somewhere with all my lost bobby pins??!!!)

After 5 mins looking for this dummy we cut our losses and move on. We make it to the dirt carpark and just as i pull in I notice a truck doing laps around the carpark wetting the dirt.

He’s just done our side of the carpark so I think I can quickly race across and make it to the other side before he laps back around.

I’m almost across when I notice him coming back up behind me.

Surely he’s going to wait for me to make it before he swings past?

He cruises up next to me, gives a little wave (you know that one you give people when you pull in front of their car a little too close) and (no word of a lie) SOAKS US WITH THE WATER.

$%^&(^%^*&^%%^(&^^****^$$$$$$$$$$$$

We went home after that.

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Top tips for successful breastfeeding

Breastfeeding requires a lot of time, patience and selflessness and it can be a lot of pressure, solely on you. It can feel like a weight on your shoulders some days and this may make you want to throw the towel in. But on the flip side, it can be one of the most natural and rewarding things you will ever d0.

I should point out that I am by no means a breastfeeding expert. My baby and I have been extremely lucky to have such a successful feeding relationship (we’ve just hit the six month mark) and I am very grateful for that.

I should also point out that not everyone is as ‘lucky’ as we have been. Sometimes, even after a lot of hard work, breastfeeding just doesn’t work out.

Hopefully, my tips help you along the path of success, so here they are

  1. (First and foremost) LOOK AFTER YOURSELF!
    You cannot expect your body to be able to look after and provide for someone else, if you are not taking care of its basic needs. This means:

    • EAT. It is essential for you to eat healthy, proper food. This is no time to start a diet or to have Mcdonalds for every meal . Make sure you have good food in the house and that its easy to make and eat. I relied on the freezer meals I cooked during my last trimester for my lunches as my newborn was on me ALL THE TIME.
    • DRINK ALL OF THE WATER. Not only will this aid your recovery AND be good for your skin and body, it’ll really help with the feeding and your supply.
    • REST. I know this is MUCH easier said than done when you have a small baby, but try your best to get in any rest where possible (Lie down on the floor with your baby when they are playing, try to have a little sit down when they sleep, etc.)
  2. BE CONFIDENT:
    So many women doubt / second guess themselves and their body’s abilities when it comes to breastfeeding. Your baby and your body really are amazing and they really will work together to help create what it is baby needs. Be confident!
  3. BE PATIENT:
    I remember those early days. Especially the first 5 days before my milk came in, my baby was literally on the boob 90% of the time and I wondered how i’d ever make it through. The next few months, her feeds would take about half an hour and would be every 1.5-2 hours. Now, she can finish a feed in about 4 minutes. Remember that it will get better, but try and use that ‘downtime’ to relax. I watched the whole series of Gilmore Girls in those early days. I’d just sit on the couch with my water and my baby and relax. I know the messy house might be yelling at you but who deserves your time more?
  4. DEMAND FEED:
    Is your baby hungry? Feed her. That simple. It might not work for everyone, but trying to put her on a strict schedule just seems so odd to me. Some days she might be more hungry (or thirsty) than others so why shouldn’t get get extra food. She might be going through a growth spurt and need it, or she might just be hot and need a drink. Think about how you feel when you’re hangry…
  5. NORMALISE BREASTFEEDING:
    Don’t hide it. Don’t sit in those STINKY, horrible baby change rooms if you don’t have to. Breastfeed in public and own it! Our bodies were made to do this and there is nothing to feel embarrassed about.
  6. EAT OATS FOR BREAKFAST:
    This tip may seem random however oats are a lactogenic food (i.e they have lactation-promoting properties) which means they will help to maintain / boost your supply. Other than that they are delicious, cheap, easy to make and are full of fibre.

Good luck and happy breastfeeding! x

 

Sh*t happens.

Those that know me probably know that I’m a bit of a scrooge. Don’t get me wrong, I’m a fairly generous person, but I HATE wastage.

We’ve been using Aldi nappies for our little one since day dot and they’ve been fine, but now that she’s getting bigger and we’ve started a bit of ‘real’ food, they just aren’t cutting it (each morning, we were getting two blow-outs). Time to call in the big guns, Huggies. (At 34cent a pop compared to Aldi’s 17cents. I think its fair to call them the big guns!)

I bought a nice big box and have been using them for nighttime and morning nappies, but the previously mentioned scrooge in me really just wanted to get rid of the last of the Aldi’s, so we’ve continued using them as daytime / afternoon nappies. What I though were the ‘safe’ times!

So here we were (bub and I), having a nice afternoon at home, baby playing happily on her mat, me preparing dinner, when I look over and… NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

I see that familiar mustard yellow seeping up her back. A quick check of the time (5:09) tells me dad won’t be home for another 21 minutes. Can I just leave it and pretend I didn’t notice and hand duties over to him as soon as he gets home? As much as i’d like to, no. No. I really can’t.

So I turn off all the pots and pans and head over, making the necessary preparations (change mat, nappy bag, baby wipes, new nappy). By this stage, its a full blown, up the back explosion, so I decide the best option is to pull her suit down over her shoulders instead of it coming off over her head. Keep things clean.

So I’m pulling them down, thinking to myself what a good job I’m doing, this’ll be pain free and we’ll be back to our nice afternoon in no time, and just as I start to pull her pants down, I guess I kind of FLICK her pants up and it FLICKS THE POO.

IN MY FACE. AND A BIT WENT UP MY NOSE.

I had to baby wipe my whole face. And arms. And top.

F*cking Aldi.

I think i’ll donate the last of them.

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A trip to the ER

I’d fed bub and was happily cooking dinner upstairs while daddy took her downstairs to hang out while he shaved ready for work tomorrow.

Happily cooking dinner until I heard a bang.

I started running for the stairs and heard ‘oh fuck’ and my sweet little baby let out an almighty scream.

The things that run through your mind when you’ve heard something like this, only a new mum would understand. The time between me starting the run down the stairs and arriving at her felt like an eternity.

When I arrived her dad had her in his arms and said ‘her head’ and when I picked her up i saw her eye was bleeding. My sweet little baby’s perfect face had blood on it.

She is almost 6 months old and has recently learnt to sit. She’s fairly steady and we’ve been fairly liberal about letting her use her new skill!

daddy had had her sitting between his legs on a bath mat whilst shaving her beard over the sink. She had reached for her toy, twisted and fell the wrong way and daddy was a millisecond too late to catch her.  She landed, eye first on the shower run.

This is what daddy managed to tell me after finally regaining the ability to speak.

I raced her upstairs, daddy in tow and popped some ice on her face. We made a quick assessment and decided to rush off to the local hospital. My major worry was an internal head injury and it was all I could think about the whole way there.

The young doctor quickly assured me, that by the sounds of the ‘fall’ it was highly unlikely that there was any risk of head injury. Phew.

He did however, want a second opinion regarding one of the cuts (yep, there wasn’t just one but TWO cuts on her perfect little face). So in comes the second doctor and confirms that no, no stitches needed, just a little glue (apparently that’s what they use these days) and there would only be a minor scar.

WAIT, A WHAT?????????????

I’d never even thought about a scar. My baby isn’t even six months old.

At this point, dad, who has been apologizing profusely to his poor little bubba this whole time, starts to get teary and the doctor leaves to get the glue ready.

I hand the bub over to him for a cuddle and we decide we can deal with a scar and we start to calm down a little.

I take a good look at him, him at me, and we burst out laughing. Not only from the relief of bub being OK, but because in the race to get to the hospital, I haven’t even bothered to put on shoes, and dad has only half shaved his face. Bub, who had just finished dinner and was soon to have her shower has food remnants not only on her cheeks but also some in her nostrils and a very dirty nappy. How this doctor managed to keep a straight face…

On the way home, me in the back with bub because we couldn’t bear to leave her alone for one second, we decided this was a friendly (sort of?) reminder at how easily accidents happen and to always take exceptional care with our tiny little bubba.

And tomorrow, well tomorrow is baby proofing day.

xx

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Sh*t new mums say

“Seriously? I JUST changed your nappy.”

“She’s teething.”

“F*ck you, Wonder Weeks.”

“Seriously? Another poo?”

“Is she breathing?”

“It’s definitely teeth.”

Daytime: “I’m so happy my baby takes a dummy. It makes life SOOO much easier.”
Nighttime: “If I have to get up to pick that dummy back in ONE MORE TIME…”

“She’s SO cute.”

“What day is it again?”

“I literally JUST changed your nappy.”

“She’s 22 weeks and 4 days. Almost 23 weeks.”

“Was that you or her?”

7pm: “Please, PLEASE just go to sleep.”
8pm: “Awwww, I miss her.”

“Where the F is her other sock?!”

“I JUST fed you.”

“She is NOT sleeping in our bed again tonight.”

“How on earth did it get all the way up your back?”

First 3 months: “My baby’s a great sleeper. I’m surprised how much sleep we’re getting!”
Next 3 months: “My baby is an asshole”

“I’m calling Healthdirect.”

“I just need to pop into Target.”

“Didn’t we just buy nappies?”

“Seriously, another poo?!”

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Best places to shop for WELL PRICED baby wear

Now, there are a MILLION places I could tell you to shop for baby wear. But what we are talking about here is well priced baby wear. Because who can afford to spend $59 on a dress the size of their hand, that your baby will probably get 1.5 wears out of? (that half a wear is because she wore it in the morning but had a poo explosion so you never actually made it out of the house with it on).

So here goes:

  1. TARGET. If you’ve read my maternity wear post you probably think I am completely Target crazy, which maybe I am? But their kids stuff is so great. You can get tights for $4, T-shirts for $5, and onesies for $6. And thats when things aren’t even on sale! Honestly, Target is always my first stop!
  2. Best & less. Probably my second favourite out of the ‘big 4’. Very very well priced, cute stuff, good range.
  3. Big W. Another of the big 4. They do their own brand which is super low priced (Dymples) plus things like bonds. They also have the Kardashian Kids collection (which I personally don’t love tbh) and will often do designer collaborations (eg. Peter Morrisey).
  4. Kmart. Whilst some of the stuff at Kmart is great, some of it also sucks so be prepared to have a good search through. Either way, you can get zip onesies for $4, making the trip worthwhile!
  5. Cotton On Kids. Cute, on-trend, well priced.
  6. http://www.Next.co.uk – Their stuff is beautiful and super well priced. Plus anything over $35 has free shipping and you can shop in your pyjamas with a glass of wine. Win!
  7. Bonds (Online, bonds stores, Big W, Target, etc). Whilst this isn’t a store per-se, it is a great brand with really cute, practical stuff for the kids. My suggestion however, never buy Bonds full price. They ALWAYS have a 40% off sale right around the corner so hang out for it and go crazy when they do 😉
  8. Trade Secret: you’ll have to dig, and deal with screaming children (hopefully not your own), but you’ll find great brands at really good prices.
  9. H&M: If you are lucky enough to live near one (Sydney, Melbourne) their clothes are really cute and trendy for a great price.

Now, if you’re also willing to go second hand, your options are even further extended!

  1. School fetes: you can pick up some really great stuff at school fetes, especially the fancy private schools. Those parents have too much money and too much time.
  2. Second hand stores: you may need to sort through a whole bunch of crap but you will find some hidden gems!
  3. eBay: Do your research on this one (don’t buy something for more than it is selling in stores) and set yourself specific price limits (it can be easy to get a little carried away,) and you’ll be able to grab bargains both new and used!
  4. Swap: Note a ‘place to buy’ per se, however there are a bunch of places / ways you can swap clothing! Setup a FB group (or find one in your area), organise it within your mothers group or circle of friends, the list goes on 🙂

It’s also a good idea to keep your eye on the big sales at department stores and other favourites, especially end of season and boxing day sales. That’s where I generally pick up the more expensive brands (the Minihaha range, Purebaby, Seed etc) at really good prices.

Happy Shopping x

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Bringing on labour

‘She’ll come when she is ready’.

I heard this SO MANY TIMES towards the very end of pregnancy. I was SO fat and swollen and uncomfortable and SO ready for her to come, but people just kept telling me to be patient.

I really, REALLY didn’t want to be patient. I’d heard of all those people who go to 42 weeks and have to get induced so I spent hours on pinterest looking at ‘natural induction techniques’ and ‘ways to induce labour naturally’.

There are millions of theories about what helps push baby along and I’m pretty sure I tried them all. I even found this random blog online where the woman pretty-much assured me that if I ate a plate of spicy wings and had a pint of Guinness the baby would come.

I tried it. She didn’t.

Heres what else I tried. Be warned, the list is long.

  • Sex
    My midwifes told me this one would help, as apparently semen contains prostaglandins, which help to ‘ripen the cervix’. It didn’t seem to work however there is no harm it trying! (And I figured we wouldn’t be able to do it for a while so why not.)
  • Hand expressing
    I was told to start doing this from 36 weeks. Whether or not it helped, it meant I could save the colostrum to give to baby if she needed it when she arrived; and (apparently) it’s a good way to get to ‘know’ your boobs before baby arrives.
  • Bouncing on a fitball
    My midwife said it definitely helps baby get into position… however I bounced on that bloody ball for SO MANY HOURS and she never properly engaged until I was in labour!
  • Walking
    I figure this one is good for you either way. Plus, it gets you out of the house and might just help by taking your mind off baby and when she will come.
  • Walking sideways up/down stairs
    Another one my midwife swore would help (especially after my waters broke and baby didn’t want to come). I personally just found it dangerous (Have you tried walking sideways down stairs at 40 weeks pregnant?!). Apparently you can walk around the street with one foot up on the footpath for the same effect, but with the added benefit of your neighbourhood thinking you’re a crazy pregnant lady.
  • Pineapple
    I upped my intake of pineapple towards the end of pregnancy, however one day (when I got really desperate) I decided I would sit there and eat a WHOLE pineapple. It burnt the inside of my mouth so bad I couldn’t eat anything else the rest of the day and it hurt like hell!
  • Spicy food
    I am sure this does not work, and if you’re suffering from heartburn it’ll only make things worse, don’t bother.
  • Eggplant Parmesan
    There’s this restaurant in America that swears they have brought on over 300 women’s labours through this eggplant parmesan dish (something to do with the basil and oregano?). Didn’t work for me, but it was yum!
  • Castor oil
    I would highly recommend NOT doing  this one. I literally had to move the TV into the bathroom and just ‘hang out’ there ALL day. I was so sick… and I was so dehydrated and felt like bloody CRAP! (PLUS: IT DIDN’t WORK))
  • Giving the baby a firm talking to
    Ha, I tried!
  • Plan something important
    Seriously, I flew from the bottom of Australia to the top of Australia at 38.5 weeks pregnant for my best friend’s wedding. If that’s not planning something important, I don’t know what is!
  • Evening Primrose Oil & Raspberry Leaf Tea
    Apparently these both help to ‘ripen your cervix’. Jury is still out.
  • Acupuncture and Acupressure:
    Tried both. And I actually got so upset at one of the appointments (“she’s not going to come, ever”) that I cried. The poor male therapist.
  • Gardening
    I left this one to last as my waters actually broke after a day full of gardening. However, I was 40+ weeks pregnant so who knows?

Good luck and remember: The baby WILL come… when she is ready 😉

ask

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